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i swear, it's not like it sounds
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| | Security: | | | Subject: | what? | | Time: | 01:16 am |
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| I'm eating old kraft dinner.
that i've recently thrown up. i mean, i'm not eating the throw up, i'm eating that same kraft dinner i was right before i threw up.
read that slowly and carefully to get the full effect. put emphasis on the 'threw'.
pffffftt. long and withdrawn.
to day eye: feel sick as always
i have no idea how one with cancer would do it. i've discovered i simply would just not be strong enough. i'd rather give up, and relax.
can't you see i'm on a losing streak? | comments: Leave a comment   |
| im smoking a joint in bed. waiting for my roomate lauryn to come home from work so we can smoke another one.
i finally got my dr's appointment though. one step closer. | | comments: Leave a comment |
| | Current Music: | Mirah - advisory comittee | | Security: | | | Subject: | bah? | | Time: | 05:11 am | | Current Mood: | good, you? |
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| I've smoked far too much weed today. You flicker you amaze me, your lips illuminate me.
I have to key keys cut tomorrow. Devon's coming. Also we are going to Sherbrooke to shop and buy me some furniture at Salvation Army, or Fat Jesus.
later | | comments: Leave a comment |
| | Current Music: | Hot Chip - Playboy | | Security: | | | Subject: | mean girls | | Time: | 12:57 am | | Current Mood: |  chipper |
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| I think this is the second day in a row that I have sat around at Ashley's house and just got absolutely blazed.we just watch movies, over and over.
And talk and hang out, order food or just get more baked.
The rooms always hazy and at the end of the day I can't remember which movies I watched. Asides from that there's some class swapping right now and I'm still getting things sorted out. Between loosing 3 add-drop sheets and checks still on hold.
The cat lit himself on fire the other day. I laughed more that I should have. But it was so funny, a cat on fire, my big orange lion/tiger cat no less, a flaming ball running around on the family room table. Causing a ruckuss. I had hung up on my brother when I threw the phone and yelled at lauryn.
a prochain fois | | comments: Leave a comment |
| | Current Music: | cat power me | | Security: | | | Subject: | back at bish | | Time: | 08:08 am | | Current Mood: |  cranky |
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| so basically, i've started everything over again. everything completely new. new life. new routines. it feels wonderful. it's what i've wanted ever since comming here. it's last semester with all the cons cut out and many more pros as replacements.
smirk*
the only thing is theres a bus stop right outside my bedroom window. the bus comes by and just sits there, waiting for passengers. It is this low frequency rumbling of the engine that really gets to me. Because it doesnt drive by, it just sits there, rumbling and i swear it wakes me up everytime. | | comments: 1 comment or Leave a comment |
| | Current Music: | chad vangaalen - blood machine | | Security: | | | Time: | 06:23 am | | Current Mood: | frustrated |
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| as long as i'm still awake, these entries are going to keep comming.
it must be that something is fucked in my head. I mean, it makes no sense otherwise. i think my internal clock is so beyond messed up that my body is doing this on purpose just to kick my head in the ass. or whatever. i mean, i lay there, and get so frustrated that i'm not sleeping, that i get all tense and angry. and that doesn't help at all.
i just ate that microwave kd stuff. it's just water and the cheese powder. ow, my stomach hurts.
what the fuck....this is ssoo soo annoying.
like when you stand in line to buy something for a good half an hour, and by the time you reach the front of the line, they've just sold out. that would really piss me off.
aaahhhh....and you'd think that i could do something productive with my time awake, but no, not really, i mostly just sit here, listen to music and think...or look at pictures i guess.
i just wish i had something to knock me out with.
thats the first thing on my new groccery list: sleeping pills.
forget the fact that i have to write a final tomorrow, sleep is being a complete asshole, and has skipped town.
you are so, so grounded when you get home. | | comments: Leave a comment |
| | i just had this memory of when i was in lawrencetown, Nova Scotia. I was surfing, in ball retracting ass freezing 12 degree water. It was my first or second time. My fingers are almost falling off and i'm standing there waiting for a wave, maybe there was a fluctuating current or something, but i must have though that i was deeper than i truly was...the wave comes and i lay on my board. it seems i have put far too much weight forward, and the board dives straight down into the water. the tip of it drove into the sand and it charley horsed my thighs really hard, then the aggressive wave really just pummelled me into the hard rocky ground, a bunch of times. it vut up my hands and feet. i got salt water in my mouth and nose and couldn't breath. when i surfaced, i had the worst brain freeze of my life for i'm sure a whole 15 minutes. it hurt. | | comments: Leave a comment |
| | Current Music: | cat power | | Security: | | | Subject: | for what's to come | | Time: | 01:02 am | | Current Mood: | excited |
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| it means the world. to me.
ah sleep. it won't come when i want it and it always overstays it's welcome.
i'm even listenning to cat power, that almost always works.
still can't wait to go home.
it'll be fun though, i mean here, for these last few weeks.
i can't wait for my life to start shaping up, after centocore of course.
it will be life altering really, i can't stop thinking about it,
i'ce never had a life like that before, i've always been so jealous.
wow, and to think that i really did just stumble upon this....
i can hardly believe it.
life altering.
i wish i could tell you what it is, but it's not important. to you anyway, to me, it's my life, and for 15 years, there's been nothing that i could do about it. nothing. for 15 years. hahah, i'm still in shock.
don't get you hopes up though, yah, i know, i know...
just play the cards as they're dealt and no one will get hurt, alright?!
aahhh, a breath of relief. finally. | | comments: Leave a comment |
| | Tags: | pop me | | Current Music: | Nena - Liebe Ist | | Security: | | | Time: | 08:26 pm | | Current Mood: |  and drained |
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| Yes, i am drained and kinda feel like crap. just tired. I dont know why i sleep so much. it's these rez rooms. I could sleep for a week in here. Guess i didn't get to bet till 7am either...but you know.
although, listening to music in german does help.
i've been in m room almost all day. i feel like theres so much to do that i'm already overwhelmed to the point where i might as well just sit here and do nothing because i'm already so fucked, what's a little more?
Now, how is that at all logical? no i didnt really think it was either. then again, i never have been the most logical type.
Fucking rez, why can't i get away from you? Let me go!!! | | comments: Leave a comment |
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i swear, it's not like it sounds
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